Momma would pick up the violin
When her heart was breaking.
And the strings she would play
Until her fingers,
They were aching.
And her tears
Made the melody
Flow from her soul.
Even though I was young,
I felt it in my blood.
The love and the hate.
The longing and yearning
As it echoed from impossible
Depths.
Each note
Bleeding
Out
From the
Fissures
Of her
Heart.
*choleintodiamonds*
* originally posted May 2014*
We all know it happens;
The quickness of life
Though we love and live
Like like we have so much
Time on our hands.
Fooling ourselves into thinking tomorrow
We can
Be love.
Tomorrow we can
Show love.
Expecting mind readers in our midst to know our thoughts and feelings.
Staying silent and planting ourselves firmly
In our justification
Of blame.
There is this moment and there
Is you.
Do not put it on others to be love.
Create the ripple effect within
Yourself.
Be the never ending
Beginning of love.
She knelt in the snow and clasped her hands to her
Heart.
Her fragile voice began to talk to anyone
Who might be listening;
Gods
Angels
Ancestors
Eagles
Snowflakes.
“Why am i so slow,
So aware?
Why does my heart overflow with love,
Yet my body shy from all?”
In the the peace in the air between her breathes
She felt their reply.
“You suffered great trauma child.
You denied yourself validation of pain.
You rejected love of others
And refused to honor yourself.
Fear became imbedded in your cells.
They are rebuilding themselves
And are reemerging as light.
Holy light of love.
Be patient.
Accept the light. Accept the love.
Lift your gaze to meet yourself in
All your grace.
You can deny yourself being no more.”
And light became her as she opened her
Arms,
Her heart boundaries dissipated as
One became one.
I sense your vibration
Before our eyes meet.
I have felt your approach
Countless lifetimes
Prior
And will countless more.
And we cry with joy each reuniting,
A soul reconnecting.
Live fully in the in between,
In what feels like the endless
Waiting.
Patience, as love endures;
We endure.
Time is collapsing around us.
No one knows what day it is;
Everyone is pretending they do anyway.
We see and willingly
Slide into the vortex.
Atoms colliding once inside,
We ride and sway in the motion
So naturally.
Quantum connection realized.
Nothing left to hide.
Truth left revealed
And it is
Love.
I step through the
Threshold
And feel the ghosts.
They want to crawl under my skin
To make a home in my veins.
They want to cling to the walls of my heart,
Stop me in my tracks.
Screaming,
“Look back!
Look back girl!”
I do not know how to stifle
Them.
I turn round
Struggling to face myself in the mirror,
Expecting to see my child self.
I look up to see Mamas eyes
Instead of me.
And her voice in my mind over and over,
“I love you, but I do not like you.”
i would like to ask her what she truly meant
But she is dead and gone.
I cannot help but wonder if she would still feel the same today.
Desirous skin
Mouth so tender
I take pause as you surrender
To this love.
Nothing left but this love.
We
Broke open.
Laid bare
And
Shattered through love.
There was too much passion to be
Contained
In one vessel anyway.
We had no choice in the collision.
Now melding.
Coalesce.
Between you and I
We are a
Luscious mess.
Originally Posted November 2015
One, two,
I am going to move today.
3, 4,
Maybe if I just roll over.
Watching my arm dangle
Off the edge of the bed,
Thinking of letting myself fall.
I wish Narnia
Was in my wardrobe.
I used to hide in the closet when I was little.
I felt safe in the dark hidden behind
The garments.
(If I was out of sight I could be forgotten)
Then,
At night I would get comfy in my blankets and plan my
Dreams before I closed my eyes.
I planned every detail;
which characters would join me, where we would go,
Who would be friend or foe.
It was fantastical.
I was usually a character in a book I read
And
I always created amazing adventures.
Comforting fantasies of exploring, friendship and love.
I hated waking up.
Pine needles
Falling to the floor.
The tree quit taking water,
No longer thirsty.
The New Year is calling;
The clock strikes 12.
Auld Lange Syne
As I wipe tears from my
Eyes
For the loves lost.
(Thump goes my heart)
Grateful for every breath.
This year went by
Like all those past
And the quicker they go
The older I get.
True believer.
Love.
Transparent skin.
Vulnerable heart
Visible within.
Keep beating,
Keep loving.
Do not allow the
Naysayers
To get in your head.
Chole Into Diamonds 